There’s a moment – right in the middle of the wedding ceremony – where the rest of the world quiets. Your hands are clasped. Your eyes meet. And suddenly, it’s just the two of you. This is where the words matter most. Wedding vows are more than a tradition. They’re your heart, spoken out loud, a promise you’ve never made to anyone else. And while the idea of writing them can feel impossibly big, it’s also a rare chance to say exactly what this love means to you – without the filter, without the fluff.
You don’t need to be a writer or a poet. You just need to speak the kind of truth that only you two know. A quiet detail. A wild adventure. A small, steady thing that makes your love feel like home.
If you’re staring at a blank page wondering how to turn this big, beautiful feeling into words – here’s a guide to help you shape it into something real, meaningful and completely yours.
Begin with a memory, not a message
It’s tempting to start with “I vow to…”– but hang on. Think back instead – when did you first feel forever? Maybe it was when they showed up with coffee and your favourite muffin after that brutal meeting. Or when you caught them dancing around the kitchen like a maniac to your shared playlist.
Your wedding vows don’t have to start from a promise. They can start from a moment. Something small and honest that grounds your love in a time and place. That’s where your voice lives.
It might sound like: “The first time I realized I wanted to marry you, we were ankle-deep in mud, lost on that trail you insisted was ‘definitely the right way.’ But you laughed like the sun was out, and I knew – right then – that even lost with you would always feel like home.”
That’s the kind of start that pulls people in. Not because it’s perfect but because it’s real. And that’s exactly where the magic begins.
If it’s true, it’s beautiful – even if it’s a little messy
This isn’t a writing contest, so you don’t need sweeping metaphors or perfectly symmetrical sentences. What matters most is that it feels like you. The best wedding vows don’t sound like poetry – they sound like truth. Even the kind that’s a little rough around the edges.
Here are a few examples:
“I didn’t fall in love with you all at once. It happened slowly – on quiet mornings, in shared looks across crowded rooms, and every time you reached for my hand without thinking.”
Or: “You’ve seen me at my best, and more importantly, you’ve stayed when I was far from it. That’s the kind of love I never knew I deserved until you.”
Those lines don’t need polish; they’re tender and human and they’ll land in a way that no perfect quote from a rom-com ever could.
Write now, edit later: No pressure to make it perfect
The first version of your wedding vows is just you talking to them without overthinking it. Let it all out. The clumsy bits, the long tangents, the lines that make you cry a little harder than you expected. Then? Walk away. Let it rest. Come back to it in a day or two and trim it down to the pieces that land in your gut. That’s where the real voice is. And that’s what they’ll remember.
Say the quiet things out loud
Another way to make your wedding vows intimate and sound truly personal is by saying the quiet things you don’t usually say – the soft, ordinary truths that live in between the bigger declarations. You don’t have to write some grand, sweeping speech. You can just speak the things that get stuck in your throat when you’re looking at them from across the table or when you wake up and realize – yep, it’s you.
Things like:
“I love the way you refill my water bottle before bed without ever mentioning it.”
“I still catch my breath every time I see your name light up my phone.”
“You make ordinary days feel like something I want to remember forever.”
Your wedding vows don’t have to be all fireworks. Some of the most moving words are the ones that whisper.
Read it out loud
Once your wedding vows are written, let them come to life. Say them out loud, in front of the mirror so that you can feel their weight. This is where they stop being just words on paper and start being a promise between you two.
Don’t worry about perfection. It’s the moments when your voice falters or when you find yourself holding back tears that matter most. Those are the moments that show how much these vows mean. Because, on your wedding day, it’s not the perfect delivery that matters – it’s the truth behind every word.
Leave a Reply