How often has the thought of giving a toast spoiled the wedding for people who get tongue-tied?
Sometimes the problem is because a wedding party can be a hotbed of secrets, says Lawrence Bernstein, who runs ChargeYourGlasses.com, a website that helps the most hapless speaker sound erudite. His fascinating survey showed that behind cleverly worded toasts lie a myriad of relationship issues.
Sobering stats:
- 45% of best men weren’t sure that they were the groom’s best friend.
- 33% of grooms weren’t certain that their bride-to-be is actually the love of their life.
- 35% of best men wouldn’t tell the groom if they didn’t like his fiancée.
- 60% of best men would not want the groom to be marrying their sister.
- 40% of fathers-of-the-bride believe that their future son-in-law drinks too much.
- Less than half of grooms are sure how many serious boyfriends their bride-to-be has had in the past.
- 70% of grooms are not sure when the bride last kissed someone other than him.
* Source: ChargeYourGlasses.com
Delivery matters
This specific website will help craft a first-class toast, but the second mountain to climb is delivering it.
- Read it. If you can’t trust your memory, don’t try to work without a net.
- Be aware of your audience. It isn’t a stag. No salty jokes. No double entendres. No exposing the past relationship record in an effort to be funny.
- Brevity is a bonus. Keep it short, warm, funny and to the point.
Women can be funny too
Maid of Honour
There’s lots of online help for women who are giving a toast, too.
It’s usual for the maid of honour to toast the bride and the best man to toast the groom. Sometimes either one can be called upon to toast the couple or they do it together. These toasts can be serious and sincere but, these days, they incorporate humour as they track the bride and groom’s past along with the usual escapades and earlier funny experiences.
One maid of honour said, “My goal is, when I sit down, I want to have tugged at the heartstrings a little and also put a smile on everyone’s face.” To pull this off, write out the speech, practise and, if you don’t trust your memory, read it.
Sisters
Sisters bring something special to the wedding. They share a lineage, so they have stored away the family secrets (and their own sister-secrets) from childhood, along with memories of the fun, the joy and the disappointments. It is your opportunity to make this day a special event for your sister. And what better way to express your feelings than a beautifully scripted wedding toast that reviews the happy and funny recollections of your shared history.
